I Believe Essay

Tonight I am working on what I hope is my final draft of my personal credo, my "I Believe Essay"....

I believe that having faith and trust in God is an essential piece of who I am today and who I will continue to be and improve upon in the future. I haven't always felt this way. I think I always believed in God, but I definitely didn't always think he was with me. I know that I didn't feel a connection with God growing up. My childhood had some really awesome days, but most weren't nearly as wonderful. Growing up in a house with two adults and five children, including myself, the last word you would think I would use to describe my existence would be "alone." Surrounded by people, I felt very alone. I think we were all just trying to survive the hand life had dealt us. Looking back, I recognize that my mom did the best she could with what she had. Her mother had abandoned her when she was a small child, just nine-years-old, so at least my mom stuck by me -- in her own way. I think if I had developed a relationship with God then, I may not have felt a sense of abandonment. I have been on a personal journey with God for the past almost two years and have grown much closer to him. I know that I am never truly alone and that God has a better plan for me than I could ever design for myself, by myself. I hope to pass the love of God on to my children so they will always know how very special they are and that their lives have meaning and purpose.

Living with purpose is something I try to do. The more focused and driven I become, the more dedicated and persistent I am, which will reflect that I am a woman with purpose. My life has worth beyond what I can comprehend. Some of the beliefs I hold dear and hope to instill in my children are to love unconditionally without hesitation or fear. I hope that knowing the purity of God's love and feeling the love I have for them will always be with them in their individual life journeys. I want them to always look for the positive in even the bleakest of situations. There is always something positive to draw from, even if it is nothing more than a valuable life lesson. It is there, just waiting to be discovered. Many of life's blessings are little things that can, if you aren't paying attention, go unnoticed. 

I want to live my life with integrity. I learned early in life that sometimes I had to lie to get through situations that could have otherwise ended badly for em, or at least that is what I believed. I lied a lot. Sometimes I told lies to spare someone's feelings, other times it was just to stay out of trouble or to take the easy way out. As I grew older and started to think more about the consequences of my choices, the more I learned that being a person who lives with integrity was something I wanted to achieve. I wanted others to know, without question, that they could count on me to always be honest and that I could be trusted. I hope that the people in my life now are able to recognize that I try to be honest and fair in all situations. I always tell my children, "If you tell me the truth we can talk about it, but if you tell me a lie then you are automatically in trouble." I almost always know when the truth is being side-stepped. I have a strong inner voice that tells me when something isn't right. I want to teach them that it is much better to always tell the truth, in the nicest way possible so as not to hurt anyone intentionally. Even if someone doesn't like what I or they may have to say, at least they will respect our honesty. 

I believe that showing kindness and patience for those around us is something every human being should practice. I love the saying, "God gave us two ears and one mouth for a reason." It reminds me to be quiet and listen. It is important to listen more than we talk. Sometimes in conversation, I interrupt the other person with "me too" interjections and I turn the conversation to being about me. I am working on realizing this before I actually do it. I am a work in progress. I think I am just connecting with what the person is saying, and suddenly I have taken over the conversation instead of hearing the other person.

I want to always have a thirst for knowledge. There are so many things in life that I don't know much about. I have always done pretty well in school, for the most part, and love to learn new and interesting things. I want to continue to explore deeper meanings and expand my understanding of things. Keeping my mind sharp for as many years as I am given is something I hope to always strive toward. 

I believe in empowering those I encounter in life with words of praise, encouragement, and support. I want to give those around me a reason to smile as often as possible. If I can leave my mark on this world through the hearts and memories of those people I have touched during my time here, than I will have lived my life full of meaning and purpose.